" OMG !!! why ? why i am hell alone when am badly messed up in any problem ? " - listening music, talking with friends , reading news papers nothing was working to light up my rotten mood!
Crying is not always solution... but who needs solution in any case?
and what can help me ? I asked myself...
" A soul to listen me not just my words... , to notice my pain not just tears... "
Now thats something tough to search - as even Google says "no match found " for above criteria!
after a while ,
messed up mind felt a miracle...
Me and a cup of TEA , when together.... I feel so much sorted and relieved!
"Daddu, Its too tough! I am feeling to much alone! I need you here, right now, right away! " - i knew i was behaving like a small kid, but its fun to behave so wid DAD!
" You know it is not possible! stop behaving like a kid- though i love when you behave so , as i feel like still you are kid and you can be with us for few more years.... , after a year you will be at "sasre" and.... " - even on phone i could feel papa's tears thinking about my marriage!
" I am not going any where daddu! and you know it well! Now tell me what I should do when i am completely lost, have no one is around to talk with? how can I feel your warmth ? how can I pretend to myself and assure myself that you are anyhow around me when I need you badly ? " - It was tough to find a way, to take a decision alone, to solve the mess on my own, to guide myself... Specially when i had DAD doing it best ways always!
" I cant be with you physically always and you know that ! ... In life it will happen many times when you will need me or some one badly to support, to heal or to guide... but remember - in hell worst situations you will be always alone! In such cases... Be with yourself, believe in your capabilities, think all positive possibilities under the negative darkness and pamper yourself with 2 warm TEA cups! i will be virtually there with you to share TEA and your worries! " - What all papa said became a LIFE-MANTRA for me!
"Hey bhums... hows you? and are you expecting some one here ? can i join you? " - My Friend asked me with surprise, pointing to 2 Tea cups...
" Yeah I am expecting some one! but never mind, you can join me! " - I had no answer whom i was expecting to be with me for a TEA!
"So, can i have this extra cup of TEA? " -
"Noap, Its not EXTRA! .... I mean , .... How i can explain... Leave it... I love having 2 cups of TEA at a time, let me order fresh for you ! " - It was tough rather painful for me to explain her about the TEA mystery!
I know Papa always keeps his all promises and so i always feel him sharing my problems, worries and loneliness with a cup of tea...
"A lot can happen over a TEA" !