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Arranged Love Marriage:: Is it worth?

New book From Chetan Bhagat - 2 States

2 States
Love marriages around the world are simple:
Boy loves girl. Girl loves boy.

They get married.
In
India, there are a few more steps:
Boy loves Girl. Girl loves Boy.

Girl's family has to love boy. Boy's family has to love girl.

Girl's Family has to love Boy's Family. Boy's family has to love girl's family.
Girl and Boy still love each other. They get married.

and story finishes!

They lived happy ever after! Is it so ????????????????

as an answer i can write a novel .... [ahhh.... sure i can... but who will read?]

from my point of view.... above story is near to many youngsters, as many have faced it and many still facing! its fascination.... to fall in love, to raise in love, to hang out wid love [ of course chori-chori, chupke-chupke!] , to make ur family meet and like [forcefully always!] ur choice... and to get married wid everyone's will and support[ is that possible really?]! its all like a fairy dream....

and as a dream its passes FAST.........

welcome to the story that begins to this end!

its not a dream - as its eye opener!

its not fascinating... but frustrating many times!

welcome to world of "Arranged Love Marriages " .

[ohhhh .... i have heard of Arrange marriage, Love marriage but whats that arranged- love marriage??? ]


"Arranged Love marriage" is an organization where the bride n groom think they r perfect and made for each other but their families think their son / daughter has the worst choice in d world and if given time and better choices they can force their son / daughter to change their decision and lead to their better future!.... sometimes even after their wedding !


I remember one incident ::


" 1 boy brings his 3 friends [ "a", "B", "C"] at his home for a get-to-gather.. all 3 girls are from different background, proficiencies and knowledge skills.... next day, boy asks her mother, from 3 gals which u think i m in love wid? without wasting a second, mother replies "B". son feels so happy saying " mom, ur d best mom in the world! how u came to know @ my choice ?"... mother smiled n replied... "B was the only girl i didn't liked a bit! " ---- thats is Arranged Love Marriage scenario ... "

Loving some1 is easy, maintaining love with "STILL SINGLE" status is easy, promising each-other to love and respect each-other's family is also easy!

[ Promises are made to be broken!]

but when it comes to ACT as promised and to love not only to your life partner but also to his/her entire family , practically it is possible but causes pain and several damage to one's individuality or respect!

each person [a boy or a girl] has an individual identity, own likes/ dislikes, strong/weak points, skills/limitations, good/bad habits, dreams... how can u expect to change his/her promptly, overnight and why??? why 1 need tho change his/her identity?

In arranged marriage Parents have selected daughter/son-in-law. so, they have considered the criteria of selection strong enough to meet their requirements! [ what an efficient search engine we have practically!]. and in arranged love marriage..... do parents have any choice ? they are forced to accept, and this force is resulted in the friction and chain of problems!

Both the families of bride and groom feel hurt , betrayed by their beloved kid and can not forget what dreams they had for their son/daughter's wedding, what plans they made, how good life partner they wanted to search [always prince/princess!] and sadly what a poor choice their son/daughter has!

On the other side, after wedding bride/groom who used to have romantic chats for hours, and spent countless hours admiring each other, after marriage spends most of time in justifying why their mom/dad said something or said nothing [!] and argue @ all bad habits they have which needs to be changed overnight as the family dnt like it ! the adjustment which is smooth in case of a typical Indian arranged marriage becomes painful like hell in arranged love marriage!

is it so painful?

Yes... at least for first 2-3 years, as it is the time both bride/groom and family takes to get adjusted unwillingly...

Arranged Love Marriage:: Is it worth? [pain V/s love]

Certainly " Yes"..... as little pain can bring your LOVE , a beautiful relation and lots of colors to ur life, its always worht!


What say people???






Comments

Vishal Kansagra said…
BD, its really insightful post from you. Gives a brief idea about what to expect in "Arranged Love Marriage". Thanks for the info and warning in advance. Now I am better prepared for this.
Aakanksha said…
hmmm...really nice.. & yeah +1 to CC... gave me advanced warning for this.... :)
Anonymous said…
yes 100% right, each word of this blog is related to me, i m feeling same situation now.
Even now a days i m sandwich between my family n in-laws, but all say that i m a lucky gal..
Unknown said…
hey bhumikaji,
it is really a truth written; about the indian youth who dares to fall=rise in love.
and yes it is a warning in advance, to people like me. kudos.......
Unknown said…
One more difference between love and arrange marriage is, you always always fight fr everything!! Like you can fight just in 5 days of your marriage, on the day of either one's birthday. List is countless but that's the best part!!! I agree it's not just worth but it's worth to die(love) for!!! Right Bhuma???

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