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God knows, when this calculative, criteria based , "bride/groom hunting" Business will stop??

"Aunty, excuse me! please move a bit, i wanna go on that side...." , a fellow passenger asked my Train buddy! 

A loud laugh!

"The AUNTY"  was too angry like she had heard some real SURTI SHLOK...... [ you know what i mean!!]

" come on "Hiral", its ok... dnt feel so embarrassed! look i have accepted the "Aunty" tag so easily! does that really matters so much to u??? "  - I asked "Hiral" to make her comfortable wid the Promotion she had just achieved!

"yous is a different case bhums, u are married, and i am not! " - "Hiral" shared the basic reason which from her perspective makes her ineligible for  the so called "Promotion"....

"So when s your plan to become a "Run away bride"  " - our beloved pallaviben opened hiral's secret plan may be! 
"Ohhh... some one is planning for "eloping" ! i find it exciting a lot! you will need a lawyer, and you have a right one ! so when you need me for it? " - Shabnam, the public prosecutor  offered her selfless help! 

"Hey wait, i though you both are going to elope together... is it so? having a close watch on you from long...under 377 , what say shabnam?" - Jayshreeben said adding some spice to discussion as usual... 

"I am normal for god sake! " - Hiral shouted as we all expected!
"So am I ! " - Shabnam cleared her case also! 

"Ha ha ha ha ...."  A loud laugh.... we all together are around 15[as recent VASTI GANATRI...] , all from different domain ranging from lawyer, lecturer, teacher, GEB personal , Bank executive, custom inspector... list goes on....

"stop jocking and take it seriously beta. i think its high time for you [hiral] and shabnam to get married .. [ofcourse wid different grooms!] ... you are now at a late age for wedding , dont you both realize?" - our angel aunty "Vilasmasi" said softly... she always treats us as her kids, and advice us nicely, regardless domain of problem... She always has right answer, advise and perspective, May be thats whats called "experience" !  

"Marriage" - its burning topic for our Compartment! and its discussed almost all alternate days! we all enjoy throwing our advises on this vital topic always! 

"vilasmasi, i am ready to even  run away... but with whom? for marriage a girl needs a BOY! [at least those gals which fall in straight category!] ... its a major problem to find a PROPER SUITABLE boy! " - Hiral shared her frustration wid all of us once again! 

"Ohhh boy! i agree" - our boyish shabnam gave hiral full support ! 

"now what do u mean by "PROPER Suitable" boy????  i mean is it a criteria or a bunch of criteria? " - i was surprised wid the idea... the Idea of arrange marriage fascinates me a lot most of the time, as i haven't been through it! 

"Its simple bhums, a well educated, well sattled[means earning big money and having heavy assets] , handsome, well mannered, good natured, sensitive, loving boy who belongs to a well cultured family! " - Hiral replied innocently...

"OHHHHHHHHHHH , then its a problem , you will have to marry 7-8 boys to fulfill the criteria! " - pallaviben fired an unusual crackle... which had sparks of truth indeed! 

"ITs not a problem...now when its the question of my lifetime , how can i compromise? " - hiral felt and expressed panic explaining her side...

"certainly you deserve what you dream for hiral... but do you think besides the "RAJSHREE" and "YASHRAJ" films such grooms are available?  " - it was my genuine Query! 

"I will find him out.... " - hiral said thinking about her "sapno ka rajkumar"... ! 
"Now what you dream for your wedding shabnam?" - next target was shabnam!

aahhhh...
" Mine is very simple... i want one who can provide me financial security! as i think one need to marry just for financial security! "- was that simple???

"wait, you said one need marriage just for financial security!  i oppose! " - Ahhh. .i am too good in arguing!
"why ? its very simple, why a girl should marry? after marriage husband is liable for all her expenses, her luxuries, her comforts and her needs! even though wife is earning after marriage, her husband shouldnt ask for her earning, why should he? "- shabnam explained her side, as though she was fighting for the case!

"and further more, i just dont agree the attitude of boys who ask in very first meeting "will you work after marriage or not? as i want to have a working wife!" .... being male he must manage to run family n shouldnt rely on his wife financially anyways! thats it! " Shabnam continued! 

"OMG! now, thats a gender bias... you want a well educated , well settled [ and list goes on...] Groom for marriage... why? as you wanna have a happy and financially sound life... now if the boy feels same while selecting bride, whats wrong? as HE is a boy he needs to suffer and as you are GAL u want to enjoy! 


Do you know whats a monthly expense for running a family of two? and how much it costs one to busy a house or a car? can you imagine? it takes a lifetime for a male to earn it on his own! and when its shared it hardly takes few years! 


now tell me from where do you buy your cloths? let me recall your last shopping list... i think this is from pantaloon or pyramid as u said! and this lipstick and cosmetics you use must be of revlon/streetwear/ l' oreal as i can see from the unusual shade and shine! and this earing as u said are from AC[ahmedabad central].....


now tell me who can afford to have you as wife , if you dont earn! will you advise your brother to marry a girl as expensive as you with the same mindset as yours??? ---  i need an honest answer! "  - sorry guys, i cant stop myself when feel something is wrong! being a lecturer, as my friends says, i can talk non-stop for 55 minutes! 



"Yeah, you are right bhumika, in this modern age, when husbands are too co-operative, sensitive and smart , who bares half responsibilities  of family [including baby care, shoppping n a lot] apart from financial burden... then why wife can not? she must! " - Pallaviben supported my thoughts!

"when you cry for "women empowerment" or "women-men Equality" , Start from Here babes! stop this gender Bias! " - I submitted my concluding remarks! and our young gen [reena, trupti and binal] listened carefully and the AUNTIE gen[married ones] felt content with the positive thought we had... 


only the confused 2's = hiral and shabnam were still focusing on recent argue and trying to make up their minds.. 







God knows,  when this calculative[how much salary, how much property, how much wealthy?? is that so important ? ], criteria based [ !]  , so called - "bride/groom hunting"  Business  will stop?? 

Comments

Harsh Pandya said…
supeeeeeeeeeerrrrrrrrrrrrrbbbbbbbb.....best post of the blog....real life experiences made this post remarkable...kudos...next to jv and cb....
bhumika said…
hey harsh!
thanx for reading!
bt it wasnt that much gr8!
[ dnt compare me wid the giants of creativity! i dont deserve!]
Swati Borsaniya said…
aha!! :-) I also liked this post so much. Most of the people find theirselves confuse before marriage.I think that list ends only after marriage. :-D
Ashish Dhedhi said…
Bhumika,

Harsh is absolutely right... Even JV n CB will not be able to explain such deep thought this easily.

You have practically spoken up for every single male who wants to be on his own feet and start a family.
Jignesh said…
I am totally agree with your thoughts...In gujarati there is one idiom, "Husband wife gada na be paina chhe" Now imagine, what if one from cycle and one from truck !!! do you think that gadu will run properly :)

nice thoughts mam...
maulikdr said…
Bhums(its more easy hope you like!)
congrats i feel this redesigned page appears more like entering to a celebrety blog.just fullfilling your way of expressions.
the topic i think is real good debate issue in a college for ELDERLY(read EXPERIENCED!)... because they only can express the pros and cons...I think if the decision of selecting a partner is supposed to be taken in few days time do we have any DIVYA DRISHTI to screen him/her for the Mr/Miss alright for the rest of life !!??
The other solution seem to be sparing some time with the person for matching the ideas, qualities and character but what are the ways to do so : Live in or LOVE in Relation ships !! with friends you like the most... But for 97 percent of people this is not possible for one or the other means... and finally you go for a COST-BENEFIT ratio...!!
I don't know if you have any solution for all... other then the characters of YASHRAJ/ RAJSHRI...
Capt. Narendra said…
Thank you for sending me the link. I liked your sense of subtle humor. Yes, our mutual friend is right. This is a nice blog and not the one to be missed on any account!
Snehal Gandhi,SCET said…
An Excellent Article which throws light upon perspectives of both the bride and the groom. Your spoken words uncovers the feelings and expectations of modern boys in this changing world.... I fully agree with your thoughts regarding equality for both ( in all sense earning,taking responsibilities of child, household work).. This is already there in foreign countries... Our girls will have to change their mentality(or one kind of nakhra of high expectation of all the best criterias )while marrige...The boys also possess equal rights in this matter..

An eye opening article.. Well done...
Vincy - Mumbai said…
hey bhumika...
greetings...m visitin ur blog for the first time..nd read this blog...

its a very nice effort to understand complicated things in a simpler way..u did a gud job.

yes...a vry supportive thoughts for guys who blvs in being real better part of their spouses nd help them to achieve things to-gether..

gud goin....all the gud luck
SANJAY BOHRA said…
SANJAY BOHRA FROM ICHALKARANJI, MAHARASHTRA.

Hey Bhumika,
Its mind blowing...
I really appreciate your DREAM (i wil not say the word 'work')...
My gud wishes are alwaz vd u....

with regards,
...Sanjz.

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BIRLA VISHVAKARMA MAHAVIDYALAYA   A PREMIER INSTITUTION OF  CVM FOUNDED IN  1948 Motto:  Work is Worship First Approved by Government as grant paid College More than  16000  engineers Graduated. Degrees offered –  B.E. ,  M.E.  and  PhD C-Cube....  A cyber cafe , a cafe , where one can enjoy his/her space as well as the food with friends!  A place i love the most!  the day when i had seen a new building of hotel in place of it, i remember , i had cried like have lost some one very dear! Ajay book stall :: A small store of books in 1999, is now a real big super book stall, where you can find any technical or non-technical book!  Its situated at nana bazar! Bhaikaka Library::  Almost all students have enjoyed reading in this huge library!  Nasta house ! jay yogeshwar nasta house!  chai/coffee, maska bun!  maza ni life!